Wednesday, September 15, 2004

girlfriend for a night

i just had a girlfriend last night.

well that was at least the topic of conversation of two close friends, oca and elaine, kilometers away. while letting dave matthews band entertain me, both were half-teasing and probably half-accusing me of having one, right after ayen.

what an amusing situation, i must say. i would have said yes, cause all this time, a part of me has been nagging for the idea of "the" girlfriend. only, there is no one (whom i like and likes me... all right there is one that i like, but am never sure if she feels the same... anyways the sigurista in me is at it again... testing the waters, as always... as oca would have said it). or to put it more appropriately (as i have convinced myself recently), there is no, or little need for one, at least for the moment.

even if loneliness is constantly at my door, knocking unceasingly. even if the need for a hug or a kiss or a touch makes me wanna hug or kiss just about anyone. the touch though would be a little more difficult--have to go to humberto's or body kneads for that.

but these reasons are certainly not enough to go into a relationship, there should be more than that. much, much more, and must i say simpler than those needs. and besides the feeling of enjoying the moment, overcomes all the need to move on to the next. i guess that is the thing about having someone, she comes when i am ready for her. when my arms are wide open enough to accept her. conditioned to love so to speak, and ready for another adventure.

but when a part of me, no matter how minute it be, is curled up, the one simply wouldn't show up, even if she is there all along.

so what's the rush?

but that girlfriend last night, would have enjoyed dave matthews...

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