pain

been trying to write since this morning... and this is my third try to articulate what my mind has been busy thinking about.

... maybe it started with friendster. found out that someone is already in a relationship already. damn.

what can i do? it is inevitable that this should transpire. i mean i was the one who let go, right? tama si angie, "hindi naman nya talaga maiiwasan na maging sya..."

that is so freaking right, and i also cannot help myself to be the person that i am. damn! i have often prayed that this would never come, when i would have to be the one who will be bearing the pain of leaving. and here it is, looking at me straight in the eye.

it pains me because i now that this will come, and i thought that i was ready for it. but no preparation ever was possible for this. i guess i just need to get through this... let the darkness envelope me and let it destroy my defenses.

my emotions have gotten the better of me... even i don't understand what i have written. probably even harder for other people to understand it...

o well...