Tuesday, November 09, 2004

the wind

watched house of flying daggers last night. i was with beth and checked out the new nccc cinemas. the price was steep by davao standards at php60 but the cinema was absolutely nice. the chairs are comfortable and the leg room, roomy (ummmm did that sound good?) , plus the arm rests can be put up for more cuddling. hehehe but no cuddling with beth last night.

anyways, after watching hero, and crouching tiger... i kinda know what i would be expecting about the movie. it would be a mixture of tragic love story, good cinematic effects, and of course sub-titles. the house of flying daggers was quite faithful to the formula. even zhang ziyi was already an instution in zhang yimou's films.

as in all movies that i've watched i always come to look for a scene or a part of it that would speak to me. this time, it is the scene where jin was riding away and he would stop amidst trees that have white barks, and stay there for a while. then all of a sudden he would turn around and race back to where mei is. and this action is coming from a man that is supposed to be known as "wind." free and playful.

i have always given high regard for freedom. it has somehow led my life all these years. i have relished the thought of me as a free spirit, going where the path leads me to. constrained still by past hurts but always living at the moment and looking towards what is ahead. more so in my adventure here in davao, i hold close to my heart the freedom that is in me.

but as jin has realized two times in the movie, freedom also entails a lot of decisions. almost two and a half years in davao has resulted to an almost realization of that truth. i can still remember mr. ayonon, my religion teacher in 2nd year high school talk about freedom as "the right thing to do." sure, it was quite easy to repeat that message, especially in my dealings with the youth in our parish. but the real impact of that "choice" element in freedom was most felt when i was really doing the decisions. and those decisions were not as easy to make. they have entailed a lot of letting go, and accepting stuff, even those things that i feel i am unworthy of.

freedom, may be like the wind that blows where it wants to. but it is also the same wind that chooses to blow to destroy like hurricanes and tornado or to refresh like a playful breeze or to stay still like a hot afternoon.

freedom is much more appreciated when it is chosen.

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